


Counterfeit

by LapisLazooti



Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Asexual Sans, Depressed Sans, Drabble, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Suicide, One Shot, Suicide Attempt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-10
Updated: 2016-11-10
Packaged: 2018-08-30 03:18:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 735
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8516434
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LapisLazooti/pseuds/LapisLazooti
Summary: Counterfeit. A fraudulent imitation of something else; a forgery.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Will I ever write something besides angst? (no) (the answer is no)

He watched his magic attack tumble in place in it's airbourne state. His soul thumped wildly behind his ribcage, but he tried his best to ignore it. He summonded the bone closer.

He doubted he'd have the guts to do it tonight. He never did. Though, he supposed it was normal for a skeleton not to have any guts. He chuckled at his own horribly joke dryly. It wasn't funny. None of his jokes were.

They were never really meant to, either, they were just... Coping. If he was funny, no one would be able to see through his grinning facade. And as a bonus, if he could get even a giggle out of someone, he felt like maybe he wasn't completely worthless. A giggle or a smile was worth something, right? Even if his usual smirks and snickers were counterfeit. He chuckled again.

Counterfeit. A fraudulent imitation of something else; a forgery. A forgery of what everyone else seemed to feel, for instance. A false matching of their energy to be perceived as happy. Like them. It seemed to fit all too well.

He was fake. Everything about him was fake. Fake, fake, fake. Faking that he was normal, in every sense of the word. Just... Concealing every bit of him that felt broken, which was frankly too long of a list for his liking.

Trying to hide the crippling anxiety and raw pain from Papyrus, who he didn't want to worry about him. Even if he really, really should be.

Trying to hide his lack of... Attraction to anyone by flirting with Grillby all the time. Everyone talked about how hot a passing monster was, and yet he couldn't feel a damn thing, even for the hottest monster in town. Heh. Thinking about anyone like that filled him with unease. It just felt kinda gross. What the hell was wrong with him? Was he broken? Probably.

Trying to hide how much he knew. Being the only one to know for a fact that multiple timelines and universes exist, and being the only one to have remembered living through them - god, it made him feel isolated. And psychotic. He wouldn't be surprised if he had lost his mind. It sure felt like it, sometimes.

And those were only a few instances of trying to cover things up.

In general, he was... To put it bluntly, alone. He really had no steady, good relationships with anyone besides Papyrus. And even then, with everything he hides, he feels disconnected from him. But it's better that way, he's enough of a burden as it is without his brother knowing any of this.

He feels tears prick at his sockets and he twirls the magic bone some more as he lets his skull tilt back and his the wall behind his bed. He honestly doesn't deserve such a loyal, strong, kind, and hardworking brother. He knew he was holding him down. It would be so much better if he just...

The bone hovered closer.

"Sans..."

His head whipped towards the door and it felt like time stopped. The attack dissipated, spent magic sprinkling down onto the bed sheets. "Uh."

Papyrus stared wide eyed in horror. Sans hopes he didn't know what he was about to do. But... As naive as the younger may be, he most definitely isn't stupid. He hurried to his brother's side in a blind panic, throwing his arms around his neck in a tight hug. "Why?" He whimpered.

God, that broke his heart. He sounded so fuckin' sad. What would his reaction have been if he had walked in only a few seconds later - only to see a pile of dust in Sans' place?

 

"I don't know. Fuck, i'm sorry. I'm so sorry." He countinued sputtering apologies. What the hell was he thinking? Papyrus needed him. Even if he got in his way sometime, he needed him. He knew he wouldn't be able to live alone, and the only other person he had was Undyne. He couldn't kill himself.

"D-Don't apologize!" He stuttered. He only tightened his grip on Sans. "Please don't do that. I don't want you to leave... Okay? You can talk to me! All of our friends are here for you! We want to help! We can get you help. We can--" He stopped when his brother started sobbing. "H-Hey! It's okay! What's wrong?"

"I don't deserve such a cool bro."


End file.
